Are Black Churches Hurting Single Women?

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There's a shortage of enduring love stories in the black community. And if the dismal statistics released by the U.S. Census Bureau, the Barna Group, and others hold steady, the decline of African American marriages will only continue. Currently, African Americans have the lowest marriage rate of any group in the United States (41 percent), and research has found that among those few that do marry, as many as 36 percent end their relationships in divorce. The numbers are bleak, but Christian marriage experts Drs. Clarence and Ja'Ola Walker believe there are steps Christian couples can take to ensure they build strong healthy marriages.

I wonder if Roland Martin anticipated the reactions he'd receive regarding his commentary "Man Up and Be a Real Dad"? The piece appeared originally on CNN.com, then later on his syndicated column's website, and his blog at Essence.com. Through the first several paragraphs, the piece seems harmless enough. After all, it's basically a remix of a well-worn social message from pastors, politicians, entertainers, educators, Christian leaders, and others: Black fathers need to step up and take care of their children.

If you are a Christian woman and you are thinking about reading a thoughtful book about male/female relationships, Steve Harvey's Act Like a Lady, Think Like a Man: What Men Really Think About Love, Relationships, Intimacy, and Commitment is not the book for you.

For the purposes of this discussion, I'll assume I'm talking to the fellas on this one. (But the ladies are welcome to eavesdrop.)

Have you ever had the urge to hit a woman? Most of us were raised with a mental line in our behavior code. Hitting females is over that line. But truth be told, the notion lurks stealthily beneath the surface. The mental picture that forms in a man's head just before the cowardly deed tends to bubble up in times of stress. When a man feels powerless, he can always fall back on physical force, like a scared dictator with armies at his disposal.